Monday 8 October 2012

1 Month Old (a little late)

Can you believe it? I can't! My bubbas are 1 month! It seems like only yesterday I was sitting in the Special Care Unit gazing down at my newborn triplets. I wonder how many years I'll say that for.....

So, it's still pretty easy. I won't lie, there are hard times. About 6-8pm. Witching hour (or 2). They are a little unsettled and really want to just be held at this time. Which is not possible. It may sound harsh, but until you've had more than 1 new born, you probably won't understand! And I mean that in the nicest way!

 How I spend witching hour when it gets really bad - note the two sleeping babies? Cheeky buggers.

You just can't hold them and cuddle them to sleep (apart from the above photo, this does not happen!). I only have 2 arms, and usually one is doing something with the other children or making dinner. I let me babies cry. I don't really do 'cry it out', but I am getting them to self settle. Dylan does it himself 80% of the time, Ailah about 50% of the time and Isaac about 20% of the time - that's without dummies.

Ahhhh, dummies. The most wonderful creation and also the worst. They are a complete Catch 22. Jordan had one until 6 months old when he got his first cold, had a blocked nose and that was it. Dummy gone. I gave Amali one when she was about 5 weeks old, and she turned into a possessed baby so I promptly got rid of it. Now, 3.5 years later she still sucks her fingers.........hmmmmm.

 Ailah having mummy snuggles

I do use dummies with the trio. Dylan has only just started liking one, which I'm not sure I like! Isaac is quite dummy dependent and Ailah usually only when she is unsettled. I'm in two minds. I will keep you updated on that one!

Jordan having some quality time with Dylan and Ailah

Gandi having her first triplet cuddle on her birthday. Isaac is on the left, Dylan on the right.


I also do routines. I use that word carefully. I am still flexible, but I keep and eye on the clock somewhat. Here is our daily routine:

5-7am wake, changed and fed, settled back to sleep
9-10am wake, changed, 'play', fed and settled back to sleep
12-1pm wake, changed, 'play', fed and settled back to sleep
3-4pm wake, changed, 'play', fed and settled back to sleep
6-7pm wake, changed, 'play', fed and settled back to sleep - this one usually takes a LONG time
8:30-10pm, wake, 'play', bath, fed and settled down for the night
They then wake between 1-2am are fed and put back to sleep, I only change them if they have a poo
And then we do it all over again!

And I'm sure this is about to change. As it will many times over. But it works for me. Lots of people ask me about feeding. If one wakes and another looks to be stirring, I wake that one as well and feed both together. Then the 3rd. If one wakes and no one else is stirring, I feed that one by itself and then wake the 2nd and 3rd. If all wake - I may put one in the swing or lie them next to me with a dummy firmly held in their mouth!
Yes, sometimes all three cry. Can't be helped. It's going to happen and there isn't always going to be someone else around to pick them up.


This is how they look when I put them down for a sleep.

This is how they look at the end of a sleep. I had no idea a 4 week old baby could move this much. That is Ailah.

And no, I'm not super mum. I get cranky at them. I've had a few teary moments. It IS hard sometimes. But I get over it. I have to. 90% of the time they are fantastic and easy. And I move on, life's too short to stress over things.

I have learnt that this past week in a big way. One of the pregnant triplet mums from Australia lost 2 of her girls to TTTS (Triplet to Triplet Syndrome) at 18 weeks. A terrible tragedy for her. And then the HOM (Higher Order Multiples) community was rocked again with the death of beautiful April. A beautiful 12 week old girl, who leaves behind her brother and sister triplets. She died in her sleep, SIDS. She was perfectly healthy. My heart stopped when I found out. I know it's naive, but you just expect after going through a high risk pregnancy, premature newborns and NICU time that it's enough. You know? Then this poor family gets hit it the most heartbreaking way. April, and many others who are now angel babies will be remembered by us on October 15th - Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. Light a candle, let a balloon go, anything, even a moments thought. If you know someone who has experienced loss, don't be afraid to talk to them about it. Say their child's name. Acknowledge their baby. Acknowledge their grief and let them know you are there for them.


Ailah


Dylan


Isaac

 I'll also be sending love across the oceans so my beautiful American friend to remember her angel babies.

3 times the love.

5 comments:

  1. just gorgeous. we know all about infant loss my cousin lost their little girl at 5 months and a close friend at 2 days. my cousin is the face of heartfelt. its so heartbreaking, especially when you have happy healthy babies - or babies that have been really sick but still manage to make it through like in my case.

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  2. Hey Chenoa,
    Have you heard or seen 'Woombies'? I see from the above pic that you're using wraps. I was using wraps, too, for my twins, and then my sister put me on to Woombies. I was so thankful for them because they reduced the amount of wake-ups as the wrap would always come undone, but a Woombie won't. They are expensive, but I thought they were worth it for me and the girls because they meant less waking. It's like a cocoon with a zip. I used them until the startle reflex disappeared. There are a number of other similar products on the market, but I believe Woombie is the only company that make a prem cocoon. My girls were in the prem size for ages, and then progressed to the newborn size. Anyway, thought you might be interested. I'll find their website and post it for you. I reckon multiples (and their mothers) have it a lot harder than singletons, so if dummies work for you guys - go for it. Singletons (and twins) are able to feed for nutrition and comfort, but this would be hard for triplets because you've only got two breasts and two arms. I personally think a dummy is the next best thing, but that's just me, and none of my babies would take one - they always wanted the breast, but the nurses in SCN wanted to give my twins dummies. Tulani

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  3. http://www.thewoombie.com.au/

    I had the prem Woombies and then I had the convertible version where you can get their little arms out. If you are interested, beware of the older version. The newer style is better - I had one of each. Tulani

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  4. Sorry, got their address wrong. It is actually:
    http://www.woombieaustralia.com.au/

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  5. Your routine sounded very much like mine, and your attitude is quite similar. Which would make sense because our circumstances are also similar. Except for the dummies. I adore dummies because my children adore dummies. And I haven't had a thumb/finger sucker yet. I was always afraid I might because all five of my babies were spotted sucking fingers or hands in the womb, and I'm afraid to admit I was a thumb sucker until I was about 8. Anyway, if you can do it without them, well done you. If not, there is no condemnation. You are doing a super job!

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